Repost: A theory of FIML

Note: I don’t care for the term “personality” if it is taken too seriously. Used as a rough indicator of how people see themselves, it works well-enough in this essay, I hope. ABN

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FIML is both a practice and a theory. The practice  is roughly described here and in other posts on this website.

The theory states (also roughly) that successful practice of FIML will:

• Greatly improve communication between participating partners
• Greatly reduce or eliminate mistaken interpretations (neuroses) between partners
• Give partners insights into the dynamic structures of their personalities
• Lead to much greater appreciation of the dynamic linguistic/communicative nature of the personality

These results are achieved because:

• FIML practice is based on real data agreed upon by both partners
• FIML practice stops neurotic responses before they get out of control
• FIML practice allows both partners to understand each other’s neuroses while eliminating them
• FIML practice establishes a shared objective standard between partners
• This standard can be checked, confirmed, changed, or upgraded as often as is needed

FIML practice will also:

• Show partners how their personalities function while alone and together
• Lead to a much greater appreciation of how mistaken interpretations that occur at discreet times can and often do lead to (or reveal) ongoing mistaken interpretations (neuroses)

FIML practice eliminates neuroses because it shows individuals, through real data, that their (neurotic) interpretation(s) of their partner are mistaken. This reduction of neurosis between partners probably will be generalizable to other situations and people, thus resulting a less neurotic individual overall.

Neurosis is defined here to mean a mistaken interpretation or an ongoing mistaken interpretation.

The theory of FIML can be falsified or shown to be wrong by having a reasonably large number of suitable people learn FIML practice, do it and fail to gain the aforementioned results.

FIML practice will not be suitable for everyone. It requires that partners have a strong interest in each other; a strong sense of caring for each other; an interest in language and communication; the ability to see themselves objectively; the ability to view their use of language objectively; fairly good self-control; enough time to do the practice regularly.