Normally, we get very little detailed psychological micro-feedback.
This is especially true of psychological micro-feedback in real-time real-life situations. Psychologically, such situations are the most important for mental and emotional growth.
Real-life psychological micro-feedback (PMF) happens whenever someone reacts to one of our acts of communication.
Most PMF reactions are not detailed because an explanation rarely accompanies them and even if there is an explanation it is almost certainly not going to include the real details of the actual communication act itself.
Rather than provide detailed PMF, almost all humans almost all the time provide only opaque responses based on their own guesswork, or presuppositions.
If there is any detail in the feedback it is almost always of a general nature that completely excludes the actual act of communication itself.
This happens because humans almost always process and use language at the phrasal level and normally never provide PMF in real-time during real-life situations.
Real-time real-life is where human psychology really lives.
By always avoiding real-time real-life PMF and follow-up analysis, humans are forced to rely on general categories and ideas to understand themselves and others. It is not possible to do this and gain a deep understanding of human psychology.
When we ignore detail in any other area of human endeavor—musical and scientific instrumentation, microscopy, art, science, engineering, etc.—we get poor results that are almost always surpassed by results that are based on greater detail.
FIML practice corrects the problem of poor detail in the study of human psychology by emphasizing the use of real-time real-life PMF.
By doing this, FIML greatly improves communication while also upgrading the general psychology of participating partners.
One of the hardest aspects of doing FIML practice is overcoming the ubiquitous human habit of fundamentally never wanting real-time real-life PMF that is open to conscious analysis and correction.
This habit can be overcome by partners’ making an explicit prior agreement to do it.
FIML is like tuning a guitar, calibrating a scale, using a good compass, caring for a fine instrument.
We expect and demand very fine detail in almost all areas of our lives, save what we say and how we hear what others say.
I do not believe anyone can achieve a deep understanding of human psychology without having a way to perceive and analyze PMF in real-time real-life. To date, I know of no other way to do this but FIML.